1. Blue

“Ohh, look at me! I’m so iconic what with my bunny ears, creepy dolls and beheadings!” You know, never mind the fact that the video really ISN’T that unique, and the song is formulaic. (Analogish synths are not helping your case on originality. Some people can make it work, but you really can’t.)

For the song itself: Gathering Fingers by Stolen Babies

It’s a song with two sides, but it actually makes you wait for the metalish part. It uses a unique structure, the hard-edged section hits harder and all-in-all it’s more disturbing, and equally more fun.

For the video: Labyrinth by Oomph!

Sure, it’s referencing Alice in Wonderland so it can’t be called original… except it can, to some extent. It has a better-executed (no pun intended) twist ending, Dero de Large The Hatter is cute and acts well (if not a little over the top), and the maze design’s nicer. Why, yes, that is a totally valid reason.

2. Looking Glass

This should take no time at all. Did you know that Looking Glass was released in 2008, and Optics (from which Cursive Eve is taken) is from 2007?

Cursive Eve by I:Scintilla

3. In The Dark

Wow. This band stoops to new lows every time. Evanescence to the rescue!

Lies by Evanescence

4. Red Stars

Yeah yeah yeah we get it already. Shut up with the goddamn false heaviness. This doesn’t quite fit, but the heaviness does – and the singer automatically makes up for it.

Nearly Dead Bat Make-Up by Pin-Up Went Down

5. Happy Birthday

Lyric-writing is so basic. It fails at disturbing, you know, like most of this band. They should TOTALLY have had the nerve to put silhouettes of the meat grinder bunnies from Psychonauts on their album covers. Maybe then they’d finally have my respect. Anyways, I turn to Stolen Babies once more. You think you know ear worms from Chibi and Rainbow and all the rest? You clearly haven’t heard So Close.

So Close by Stolen Babies

6. Kill The Lights

Ah, the song that made me despise this band in the first place. I give you a less full-on equivalent.

Gothic Lolita by Emilie Autumn

7. Video Kid

Answer: the synth sounds. At least CC can do something interesting with them. That is all.

Empathy by Crystal Castles

8. Goodnight

The Bells by I:Scintilla

9. Lover’s End

Oh dear. I’m having to repeat songs I’ve already used, this band is so goddamn generic.

Labyrinth by Oomph!

10. Nevermind

You know what? No. There is nothing in my collection that can even be similar to this… this monstrosity. Kill it with fucking fire and get out of my sight.

Kthxbai,

Moni x

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Jamiroquai – Rock Dust Light Star

The masters of funk-pop return with their first all-new album in five years. Jason Kay remains the soulful, catchy singer we know and love, and it’s not too much of a departure from their formula – so it’s certainly a safe buy if you’ve heard them before. Though it will take a while to get into if you’re used to their style displayed in Dynamite, trust me; it’s worth the few listens.

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Angelspit – Larva Pupa Tank Coffin

The most impossibly cool cyberpunks are back, with the Hideous and Perfect remix album. A full first listening points to ruin – and that’s exactly how they planned it! Sure; it seems that the band’s programming (their own ‘Ditch The Rest’ remix, as an example) far outshine that of their guest remixers, but that doesn’t stop the album from being a great, pretty epic buy. And it’s not just remixes – there are four original tracks, including the nightmarish piece of genius that is ‘Not Born, Hatched’ and the ultra-catchy, classically Angelspit ‘Twenty6hundred’.

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I:Scintilla – Dying & Falling

There is no doubt that Optics is going to be a pretty difficult album to beat, and there is no doubt that this release has just fallen short of it. But the unique stylings of the band have come to save them, for Dying & Falling is in its own right a satisfying listen, even for a band who have set such a high standard for themselves.

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Done! Okay, if that was TL;DR for you, here’s something quicker: BUY THESE ALBUMS. They are all a bit flawed but you won’t regret the purchase.

Moni x

Anyway, here goes.

Before the ranting commences, please, allow me to state one thing: I don’t like dancing.

Don’t get me wrong here. I’m not saying I don’t like it whatsoever, or that dancing isn’t fun; it’s just that outside the club environment I’m not likely to begin stomping and flailing my arms about when I feel a strong beat. Not even when I’m home alone. Especially not when I’m home alone. Everyone already suspects I’m a lunatic.

Really – whether my thoughts on Human After All would suffice for a small ‘no’ scribbled onto paper (in blood, for better effect) or a redundantly long tome, I’m simply not of Daft Punk’s target audience.

The album opens with the title track – ‘Human After All’, with some crunchy vocoder work that produces an interesting sound, drawing you in. (Kicking and screaming.) However, it’s overly repetitive – as I was to find out, this is not a rarity – and has some hackneyed chord progressions. It needs a stronger beat supporting it all; the sound design just doesn’t work.

This is quickly followed by ‘The Prime Time Of Your Life’. The dissonances they created between the parts were nice, but they fell at the way they delivered them. The ending (in which the loop gets progressively faster and faster) was unnecessary and left no room for track development.

We also get ‘Robot Rock’; hands down, the best track on the album. It features a super-catchy, flanger-heavy riff with –gasp- some actual developed ideas here! It’s sounding like a real track! However the vocals could have come straight out of a Kraftwerk track. I assume this was intentional, but still, it didn’t really sound right. I’m willing to excuse that – if they did that sort of track all the time, I’d normally listen to this band!

Departing from a safer sound is ‘Make Love’. It sounds like a little theme that was responsible for the demise of the poor souls that were put on hold and lost the will to live.

The screams and alternating choppy vocals and rhythm on ‘The Brainwasher’ create a dystopian, cyberpunk atmosphere. And it’s awesome. However, the song is very technically simple so that immediately spoiled it.

‘Television Rules The Nation’: ironically, Daft Punk’s music (and remixes) seems to be used quite a lot in TV adverts. Stop biting the hand that feeds you and go and buy some more synths! The same style of design on all of the tracks sounds lazy and boring.

Now, the infamous ‘Technologic’. The short and sweet beats give a sense of moving forward in the track. However, chipmunk voices are annoying without fail. (Even robot chipmunks.)

‘Emotion’ can be summed up in two lines: The same four bars over and over (and over and over and over and over and over) again.

I am not surprised when I hear the album was created in six weeks. I understand this minimalistic, repetitive approach is endearing for some – and some of the tracks are very dancefloor-friendly – but it’s basically what would happen to a renewed Kraftwerk if they didn’t have the musicality or imagination.

Must I give it a rating? I give it 3/10.

I have three mini-reviews for you guys! None of the albums are new, but I hope they’ll help you make your decisions.

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THE GOOD

Tomahawk - Tomahawk

Track listing:

1. “Flashback” – 2:58
2. “101 North” – 5:13
3. “Point and Click” – 3:09
4. “God Hates a Coward” – 2:39
5. “POP 1″ – 3:25
6. “Sweet Smell of Success” – 3:48
7. “Sir Yes Sir” – 2:09
8. “Jockstrap” – 3:51
9. “Cul de Sac” – 1:44
10. “Malocchio” – 2:42
11. “Honeymoon” – 3:07
12. “Laredo” – 4:16
13. “Narcosis” – 2:39

3 reasons you should buy it:

• It has Mike Patton in it. Every project he touches turns to gold.
• The lyrics are very epic. This may or may not tie in with the presence of Mike Patton.
• It’s musically diverse, but not stupidly so. Also, Mike Patton’s singing through a gas mask.

3 reasons why you shouldn’t:

• If you don’t like Faith No More, you’re not gonna like this. Probably not, anyway.
• Some tracks should be longer than they are (for example, God Hates A Coward) and some should be shorter (Pop 1)…
• There is no third reason. I lied.

The 3 best tracks:

God Hates A Coward, a catchy, cinematic but ridiculously short track with some great melodies; 101 North, an impossibly catchier track, it’s heavier and at the perfect length; Laredo, which manages to create perfect, smooth contrast between the sections.

Other comments:

A lovely release of consistent quality and a must-buy for Patton fans.

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THE BAD

Switchblade Symphony - Serpentine Gallery

Track listing:

1. “Bad Trash” – 3:42
2. “Dissolve” – 4:31
3. “Wallflower” – 4:58
4. “Wrecking Yard” – 5:09
5. “Clown” – 5:35
6. “Cocoon” – 2:07
7. “Dollhouse” – 4:06
8. “Sweet” – 5:43
9. “Gutter Glitter” – 3:48
10. “Mine Eyes” – 4:24
11. “Bloody Knuckles” – 2:41

3 reasons you shouldn’t buy it:

• Root’s vocals, which alternate between a throaty nasal alto and a throaty pseudo-operatic soprano, creating what sounds like a bizarre duet of Avril Lavigne and Emilie Autumn. I reckon we can safely say that at least Autumn pulled it off a lot better than Root did.
• Scratched into the manuscript at the very last minute is the melody, which somehow makes the singing more frustratingly dull than it already is. Most songs have two notes per section, occasionally stretching to three – gasp! – if they realized that no record label would release such boring mulch. (Turns out I was wrong, just look at the charts today.)

• The sound design is awfully lazy and the lyrics are a bit generic.

3 reasons you should:

• Despite the intensely boring tracks, there are some good ones – especially if you buy the 2005 deluxe edition featuring the lyrically dissonant ‘Blue’ and the creepy ‘Waiting Room’.
• We’re also given the instrumental parts accompanying Root, composed very well (if not effortlessly) and sure to get into your head in no time.
• Please don’t forget that most of what I listen to is quite of the opposite sort of ‘dark beauty’. I’m sure there are some that love this but please accept that for me this was a waste of my money.

The 3 best tracks:

Dollhouse; Bloody Knuckles; Gutter Glitter.

Other comments:

Overall, Serpentine Gallery is tedious, uninspired and just plain…plain. Do yourself a favour and get a better darkwave album.

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THE FUCKING INSANE

Unexpect - In a Flesh Aquarium

Track listing:

1. “Chromatic Chimera” – 5:52
2. “Feasting Fools” – 6:17
3. “Desert Urbania” – 7:30
4. “Summoning Scenes” – 7:47
5. “Silence 011010701″ – 5:14
6. “Megalomaniac Trees” – 5:57
7. “The Shiver – Another Dissonant Chord” – 3:00
8. “The Shiver – Meet Me at the Carrousel” – 4:08
9. “The Shiver – A Clown’s Mindtrap” – 3:41
10. “Psychic Jugglers” – 11:10

3 reasons you should buy it:

• If you like ‘fucking insane’ things, you’ll certainly enjoy this. In case the title didn’t make that obvious. Also, I recommend it for fans of Stolen Babies or Sleepytime Gorilla Museum.
• These guys are obviously excellent musical composers. Every track manages to be very clear, despite that it changes all the time. They’re very technically sound too.
• The actual -content- is so mad it’s made of genius.

3 reasons you shouldn’t:

• The lyrics are good in some places, but sometimes they just scream ‘wannabe’! Which is an awful shame since their music is certainly not‘wannabe avant-garde’.
• Some songs need more contrast and softer sections. It’s a bit full-on.
• If you’re not, or hate anything ‘fucking insane’.

The 3 best tracks:

Silence 011010701; Meet Me at the Carrousel; Psychic Jugglers

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Links:

• Tomahawk on Spotify: Tomahawk – Tomahawk
• Switchblade Symphony on Spotify: Switchblade Symphony – Serpentine Gallery – Deluxe 2005 Edition
• Unfortunately, no Unexpect albums on Spotify right now. However, they’re available on iTunes.

Thanks for reading. Love,

Moni x

Todd Edward Smith is an American singer, songwriter and guitarist. He is part of many alternative metal/rock groups but is best known for fronting Dog Fashion Disco.

Why?

I’m recommending him mainly because of his vocal talents. His voice is very, very attractive! Seriously, even his growling’s nice to listen to, and this is coming from someone that doesn’t usually find this, at all. He can pull off falsetto as well. If I was to describe his usual singing style, it’d be that it was rather manic, a little strange and pretty damn enthralling.

Of course, another reason he deserved this recommendation is for his lyrics. He weaves sadistic little stories all about serial killers, witches, mad doctors, evil cults and stalkers. And they’re all quite masterfully (if not dementedly) told. He could also be the king of lyrical dissonance. According to an interview he pulls his lyrics “out of the ether”… They’ll get stuck in your head in no time.

Bands

Dog Fashion Disco – avant-garde ‘movie metal’ band, of which Smith was a founding member.

Polkadot Cadaver – basically a spiritual successor to DFD – picking up where they left off to continue the madness. Very stylistically similar, if not even more catchy.

El-Creepo! – Smith’s solo project. It focuses more on acoustic, mellow tracks. All said acoustic songs will contain lyrical dissonance. No exceptions.

The Alter Boys – a collaboration between the members of DFD and Mushroomhead. Haven’t really heard much of them, but what I have heard reminds me of Mr. Bungle. If you like them you’ll probably like this.

Knives Out! – a heavier project. Once again, I have yet to hear much of them.

Playlists

Playlist One: All of the tracks I could find on Spotify from the above artists. (Note: Quite a few of the tracks have been mislabelled. >.>)

Playlist Two: My favourites.

Ridiculous mislabelling on the El-Creepo! tracks. For example, ‘Easy Killer’ is in fact ‘El-Creepo!’, ‘Bloody Mary’ is actually ‘Witch Hunt’ and ‘Orange Peel Sunrise’ is ‘Easy Killer’ =/

(Don’t have Spotify? Get it here. It’s free. Let’s hope they’ll keep it that way…)

Further Listening

Dog Fashion Disco – Myspace

Polkadot Cadaver – Myspace

El-Creepo! – Myspace

Knives Out! – Myspace

The Alter Boys – Myspace

Dog Fashion Disco – Similar Artist Radio (last.fm)

Thanks for reading.

Moni x

Before this, I’d had plenty of ideas for a music blog, but never had the motivation to start one. But a series of brief and seemingly trivial events pushed me.

It all began while I was browsing the Last.fm group forums, and a notice caught my eye: a so-called Mike Patton/Faith No More/Mr. Bungle (and related projects) listening week. Myself, being a big fan of Patton, thought this was a great idea.

That was when I checked out the original poster. From their profile I found out that they ran a small but vocal group of people with/seeking a ‘diverse’ music taste.

And their leader’s library? 22,584 Artists in total. Erm…well, that’s certainly diverse. A little scary, but yeah.

But despite the wonderful cosmetic award, I really did wonder if they had some real passion for any of those artists. Maybe they just have a short attention span.

But you know what? It didn’t look like an ‘award’ at all. It struck me in the wrong way. It struck me that this whole diversity act is a load of pretentious, cultish bull that supposedly gives us ‘bragging rights’. Don’t get me wrong – no diversity whatsoever is not good at all. But is tons of it much better? Besides, what if the artists all belonged to the same genre? Some people just really love their dance music.

Anyways, if the cult– uhh, I mean, group leader is reading this right now, I apologize for slagging you off. But you should be grateful. For I’m announcing you and your ideas as inspiration! How about that.

Kthxbai,

Moni x